The symbolic ceremony
If we ranked the new trends in Italian weddings, we would surely find near the top vintage shabby-chic fittings: a decline of the dressed chair in favour of Chiavari and Kartel, and roundtables dispossessed by the imperial tables. But the holder of first place is surely the symbolic ceremony.
Unthinkable for an Italian bride of only a few years ago, it marks a change in the new generation’s dreams. If walking down a church aisle in a white dress for a long time represented the only alternative in the popular imagination of weddings, the recognition of civil unions and images from the Anglo-Saxon world which overflow the web, have disrupted this monopoly.
Many people think that this new trend is the mirror of the superficiality of our society: I personally, who with my couples bring this trend alive, strongly disagree. First, we need to point out that symbolic is not synonymous with fake or replica. Let’s make some clarifications about our laws. In Italy, on the contrary to what happens in many other countries, you cannot celebrate in any place other than an officially recognised one. Today more and more venues are making partnerships with municipal offices in order to be able to hold legally recognized celebrations in their rooms, but this is still a minority.
The obstacles of bureaucracy, particularly for foreign couples; the limited number of locations which exercise the possibility of official rite; the low appeal of many Italian town halls; and, let's be honest, the not-always-emotional approach of many public officials in the celebration, made the alternative of symbolic ceremony more and more appealing.
In fact, this is not formally restricted, and can be celebrated anywhere and by anyone: the "celebrant" can be chosen for their narrative skills and empathy. They set, and their content reflects, what is valuable for the couple; they reflect the couple’s path and offer an emotional bridge to the guests. It's a ceremony that respects the breath of emotions: smiles, affection, and winks. Sometimes it also includes the formal element of a civil ceremony.
In the world, and now in Italy too, there are specialists who take care of the journey, starting with a meeting/interview with the couple, and culminating in the celebration.
Of course, unlike the religious ceremonies held outdoors, such Jewish or Protestant ceremonies, the symbolic ceremony is not a sacrament. Do not forget to go first to the Municipal offices for the official legal rites! When the procedure is over you are ready: wearing the dress, waiting for the bride; the curiosity of the guests, the groom at the altar, salivation at zero... the music starts, and she arrives. The bride and groom look each other: "Do you like me?"
"You're more beautiful than ever..".
Words repeated without being ever spoken: it is the ritual coming back; it is the magic of emotions for hearts that want to bear witness to them.
Anyone who has experienced at least once these ceremonies knows what I mean. I personally, who has had the pleasure of writing the ceremony and personally celebrate it for several couples, can say that the energy of this unique moment is palpable. Furthermore, I think that if the collective feeling legitimises the symbolic ceremony, a deeper sense is conferred to the religious one too. The couple who chooses this path doesn’t take it just because, superficially, the entrance to Church is nicer; but because, on some level, they have an awareness of the religious ceremony too.
